How Self-Destructive Behaviour Can Be Turned Around. I Know, Because I Did It.

People change. We evolve and adapt to our surroundings. We learn and grow and alter our ways for how our life needs us to be. And we can only hope it is for the better.

Before I met my husband, I was headed down a dark path. Self-destructive in all the depressing ways. Now to be clear, I wasn’t into anything heavy, but drinking to excess more often than I should have was certainly my vice. I was depressed and anxious about everything. I was unhappy with where my life was and the lack of accomplishments I had achieved up until the age of 30. While I had my own successes in other ways, all I ever wanted was a family of my own and I hadn’t found it yet. Everything changed once I met my husband.

Let’s get one thing straight, I did not change who I was to my core, but I was shown how much more life has to offer. I had been stuck in a rut for so many years, I had lost a lot of hope. He did not change me, I changed myself gaining internal strength and ambition with my husband cheering me on.. And once I became a mother, well that changed everything about me in every way.

I am not the same person I was 5, 10 or even 20 years ago. I have learned so much about who I am and what I truly want in life. While I feel I have so much to work on personally, I am confident in who I am and what I am capable of. Anyone who may try to say to me, “You’ve changed.” Damn right I have! I never want to be out of control of my mind or body ever again. I refuse to ever let my children see me in an altered state because of my own actions. I make all of my decisions with their best interest at heart. Fun for me looks completely different than it did years ago when I was clouded by my own thoughts and fears.

Here’s the thing, I am not some special case who had some miraculous coming of age moment where I hit rock bottom to find my way back again. I adapted to my life’s surroundings. I live by accepting what I cannot change and striving for more within the areas I can change. I have so much more work left to do, but I have started in the right places.

Anyone can do this. If your life is not serving you as you wish it would, change it. Find another job, try a new hobby, break the bad habits, end that unworthy relationship, move to a new environment, etc. Change is scary and hard at first, but it can evolve into something so beautiful. Why stay stuck when you ultimately don’t have to. Why remain in the same distain if you want to grow beyond it.

Familiar pain might feel safer than the unknown, but you don’t have to keep letting it drain you. Are you confusing responsibilities with your own fear of change? I’ll never forget this amazing quote “your body is going to give you a couple soft whispers before it starts screaming.” Meaning you need to listen to your instincts, sadness, pains and health concerns within yourself before it is too late. We all go through ups and downs in life. It is how we choose to move past them, or make excuses for them that can make all the difference. Become who you want to be, I promise it will be for the best.

Melanie xoxox