Currently Not My Season

I am a mother to two very small children, so there are some things that just don’t currently jive with my lifestyle. I see other mothers and some of my friends who get to do and have certain things that just simply do not make sense for me in this current season of my life. And that is totally okay, because my day will come.

Before having kids, you don’t necessarily think of what you will likely be giving up once you become a parent. Aside from the obvious, knowing your freedom and flexibility within your schedule will be significantly tampered with, some simple luxuries are no longer accessible or just don’t make sense at the time of having small children. While I wouldn’t change having my kids for the world, there are some things I do miss from my days before they entered the world.

Here are some things that are currently not in this season of my life.

Having nice nails. While I have never been a girly to get my nails professionally done, I was that girl who could maintain a DIY manicure. I had so much nail polish at my disposal and would change up my colours on the regular. I had long, healthy nails and was proud of this as a former nail biter in my younger years. And while during pregnancy my nails were strong enough to puncture packaging, postpartum they are fairly weak and I must keep them short so I don’t accidentally scratch my children during diaper change wrestling matches.

Letting my hair down. I try, oh boy, do I try! While I am not very talented with styling my hair (which I am working on now that I have a daughter whose hair I will need to style) even trying to wear my hair down and enjoy it’s length, ends up being tugged and put into my baby’s mouth. When we attend family events, I try to leave it down and look cute, but I always keep a hair tie on my wrist for rapid need, to whip it up when lifting a child. And no, I will not be cutting it short, that is just not for me. I will, one day, get to enjoy my hair being free once again.

Time for myself. While my husband is amazing and does give me the chance to run errands, attend appointments and go to the gym to get some personal time, mom guilt is a real thing and I find myself rushing through things to get home to my babies faster. This is a me problem, I am very aware of that. I am a full-time stay-at-home-mom who takes her job very seriously. I know these days feel long but the years are short and one day these little ones will be in school all day and I will get much more freedom. So until then, I take what I can get when I can get it. Even just 5 minutes to meditate in the next room.

A thriving social life. Thank goodness I have the friends that I do and we have grown together into the understanding adults that we are. There is a lot of “we should get together” that never pans through. Or rescheduling because someone gets sick because kids social lives involve so many germs! We at least have texting and FaceTime and social media to keep up with one another nowadays. One day we will have nights of dancing and chats and dressing up once again. Until then, we catch up more than creating new memories.

Sleep. Oh, how I miss thee. Yet, I literally wake up extra early each morning to try and gain any “me time” and organize the day ahead before my children wake up and take over my attention. We are still waking up through the nights over here and some nights my daughter decides that going back to sleep is silly and for chumps. And from what I hear, as a parent, you never really sleep the same as you did before kids, ever again. So there is that!

Fragile home decor. Everything must be baby proofed in the presence of my children. They think everything is a toy, no matter how dainty and breakable an item is. And straight into the mouth for little ones, up into the air from a throttled throw from toddlers. Basically, anything from an adults waist down is fair game to them and at risk. Even lamps or picture frames, it’s all at risk. One day I can have cute decor on my coffee table again, until I have grandchildren and need to clear it for their visits. It’s the circle of life.

I am just keeping it real with all of these long lost niceties. I look back at my younger years and laugh at the freedom I took for granted. The things I worried about then, while valid in those moments, are small in comparison to now. Becoming parents really puts life and the world into perspective.

I love my life now, and wouldn’t change it for anything. All of this is just a season we are living in and once it’s over, we will miss it. So I am not complaining one bit, because my next season will be different and possibly incorporate some of these things I’m “lacking”. I say it like that because these are mere thoughts in the beautiful chaos of my day that I had dreamed of for so long. All I ever wanted to be was a mother, and I am now living that dream and I feel so lucky.

Melanie xoxox